Saturday, December 20, 2014

Fear is a motherfucker

So yes I did move into a new situation and it hasn't really been conducive to writing. My output is about less than half of what I'm used to putting out and hopefully it won't last long. However, on top of that I was stupid enough to take my eyes of my paper and with all the sales going on during Thanksgiving and looking at the freebies and new stuff coming out from other writers I was completely thrown off my course. And I do mean my course, I don't write BDSM, I don't want to write it, I don't write MC books because I have very personal experience with them and they are in no way whatsoever romantic-fuck SOA it's not even half as gritty as the real stuff. Yet, there's all these quotes and titles coming out and I'm actually wondering to myself, is this what women really want? Should I try and write these and it will expand my readership?

No joke for two weeks I was frozen in fear I wasn't doing what I could be doing that could help me succeed. I was constantly looking at Facebook and the flood of books out there, reading sample after sample and then one of the quotes thrown up on the new 'it' book that should have been sexy made me laugh, I could not stop laughing. All I could think was, this isn't sexy this is sex, That isn't who I want to be, I don't ever want to write something like what I just read. It became crystal clear in that moment.  What I write isn't for everyone, I want to write something with a heart and soul and a whole lot of sex and although people would like to think they are different, special, unique and in one way or maybe another they are, we are more alike than different-and I don't think that's a bad thing. So my sales have shown me there are a quite a bit of people out there that like what I'm doing now and to change it up to try and be something isn't what I should do. 

So I'm going to take my eyes off the others that are out there and focus on mine, and damn did something really interesting come out of it (writing now and so excited) and write what I write. As I said before, just do what you do and the people that want that will find you. 

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